“I love you, Savannah, and I always will," I breathed. "You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You were my best friend and my lover, and I don’t regret a single moment of it. You make me feel alive again, and most of all, you gave me my father. I’ll never forget you for that. You’re always going to be the very best part of me. I’m sorry it has to be this way, but I have to leave, and you have to see your husband.”—Dear John, the book
Ok, so I know that I lied. I haven’t been on for like 2 days now I think, or was it 1? Anyways, I haven’t been on cause I’ve been busy finishing upDear John the book. I finally finished it today at 4 on the third day of reading it. I stayed up until 2 last night and finished it up this afternoon. It is just oh so sad! Well, I didn’t have practice today, so it was a good time to finish it or else I know that I won’t be able to finish it until school starts on Monday. Yesterday was our orientation. I was so glad to see some people, which makes me wonder why the whole summer, I have said that I hater Waldorf so much? Maybe it was just a routine, something I was used to since The San Francisco School wasn’t that great either. I hated most of my days there, but going back yesterday to the orientation, I thought about my freshman year there. It was A LOT better compared to middle school. Why do I keep saying I hate it? It was an excuse. I know I like it there, but I just want to visit a public high school just to see what it’s like. I know that Leon was right, I never know if I will actually like it the way I learn to appreciate Waldorf. But anyways, yesterday when we received our main less block group, I was almost estatic. I love my group, it basically has EVERYBODY that I like in the class, besides just John, Mayra, and Sophie, but it’s all great! I have just the right people in it! With them, I’m pretty sure my sophomore year is gonna sail through swiftly (: In the car at first, I was thinking of so much to write here, but now I’m just blanking out on all the things… and I knew it was going to happen too! Which makes me mad. Well, I talked to Stephen last night because he appeared in my dream 3 nights ago, which I’m glad that it did happen because I miss him so much cause he’s like a brother to me even though we don’t talk as much as I wished we did, but this is another great start, since we never really did find out what happen the last time to stopped talking to each other. I still blame myself for not going to see Dear John with him back in February. To be honest, I was scared the first time because it would have been my first time going out with a guy. I know it’s just a friend date thing, but I was actually scared. He hurt his ankle during basketball, so we had to reshedule it the next week and well.. I blame my mom for not taking me because I was kind of hoping that I would finally go cause we haven’t seen each other for so long! HAHA, yeah, he’s a nice guy. And this brings up this summer when he and Aaron showed up for our basketball game against SF Community, and we went down to 7-Eleven then Quicklys with Scott Yee. That was probably the best day of my summer 2010, and I really hope it would happen again next summer! (: I SIMPLY CAN’T WAIT .
heeeeeeey! so i know i haven’t updated my stuff here, but it’s just cause something was wrong with my comp, so i gotta go get it fixed. the week without my computer is just TORTURE. but at least i was busy with my summer reading, which still, I need to complete. Without my computer, I would always think of so much to write on here once I get back, but for some reason, I forgot all. I guess it’s time for a fresh new start! But today was soooooo hot. It was unbelievable. Practice today was aiight, could have done better I thought, but ohwells, what’s done is done. It’s getting kind of late, so I’ll write more tomorrow, I promise :)
I hate how everyone’s back in school, and I still have 2 more weeks left. I just really wished I could be one of them now cause i still wish to go back to a big public high school. I guess it’s okay though cause i still have my summer reading to do =/ but i know that if I was never put onto the road for private schools, I wouldn’t have had the best experiences at Aim High Visitacion Valley Campus. But I also have this longing that I know that being back in a public school, I would have a lot more fun, maybe like Aim High. I guess some things do happen for a reason, and I’m glad I’m almost through. Just hope high school goes swiftly. But on the good note, I’m really happy to have joined volleyball. And today at practice, just Adrianna’s saying to me how she and Kyra think I have improved a lot made me wonder. If I never got accepted, I would never find out that I love volleyball and now I feel really mad that I didn’t get to play at much at Aim High during our volleyball match against SF Community. I REALLY could have done better, and I knew the other guys could have done so too. PUT YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME! but yeah, i feel a bit lonely now that everyone’s busy with their homework and practice and stuff. For some reason, I kind of want to go back to school, but it’s always like this. Everyone is excited for the first day of school, and afterwards, it just goes downhill with all the homework. So today, seeing my sister go back into my old fourth grade class make me miss E.R. Taylor Class of 06 even more! And I really wish for my Sweet 16th, I could have the reunion that I have been dying for! And talking to Daniel Wong’s parents and Stephen Ruan’s parents, omgod. We were THAT little when our parents were all close. And also standing outside Room 10 waiting for my sister to come out, I found our class picture at UCSF back when I was in fourth grade. AHH memories :)
So I was looking at his facebook profile and I basically imagined how cool it was to go to Galileo. Maybe not even, just any public high school. To have guy friends like that who are to you like best friends. And just hanging out with the same group of people over the weekends. I have wanted that ever since elementary school! But I know nothing’s going to change… for a while.
it’s a life without flowers. and how it’s so in black and white. if this ain’t love, i really don’t know what it is. if we just hold hands and just stroll around the park, what would you actually think. i mean if this was real, your heart would be pounding hard like mines right now at this moment. and as we go closer, i could feel your breath. that spearmint breath. it’s funny how i would imagine this cause i wanted this so bad when i was a little girl. i can’t say that i’m not a little girl right now, but it’s just this longing to go back when everything was alright. when us kids playing four square in our court or screaming and running away from the person who had “cooties” for the minute. and how everybody would lie and pull out their hand and supposedly, it would be crossed, just to fight off “the touch”. it’s a wonderful memory if you ask me. and just how i wish everyday at 11:11 that i would soon be happy with my life and create wonderful memories as i grow older. just hope it’s around the corner. and someday, i will smile and look back at how foolish i have been all these years.